Category Archives: ECT

You cant shock an actress with less than a few hundred volts!

One of the amusing things that happens at work, is that some people think I can be easily shocked, because I seem such a quiet old lady at times. No idea where they get that idea from, but anyway…

So when the talk arose about a new seat for myself, designed to at least aid me with my back issues, someone in the office came up with some interesting designs, shall we say? No, I’m not going to describe them, but some of the items involved were definitely, err, adult, shall we say? It fair to say he wasnt expecting my reaction to be just how much I liked the look of them! Yes, lets say that one of them would make moving your chair an arousing experience, and leave it at that.

The snag with that, of course, is that in my acting life, its fair to say that I’ve seen my share of weird things used as props, and I’ve certainly worn some outfits that you wouldnt normally walk down the street wearing. Fairies, gnomes, and all variety of fae folk, yes, been there, acted that, probably!

I’ve also worn leather in my time, though I’m not sure if that was for a role, or for a shoot, as it was a long time ago now. I’ve also worn a silver zentai suit for more personal fun reasons as well. Now, a role that required me to wear something like that, oh yum!

Mind, nowadays my body is probably in a state (with the need for a wheelchair at times) where the Davros (of Dalek fame) look would be more apt, and more suitable. And fine, I wouldnt mind the wired up stuff either!

But in truth, probably the weirdest (though both for charity reasons) were outfits where if I didnt remove the head, you wouldnt have known I was in there. One Children in Need day, while working in Newbury, I wore a Teletubbies suit at work, all day. Tinky Winky, if I remember rightly, for those who want to know. But as I was working, between photos being taken, and taking donations, that head didnt stay on all day. Might have been fun, but hot if I had, but anyway…

Much further into the past, I actually wore a similar design, and didnt get to take my head off, for a few hours at least. Yes, for some charity event (I have no idea, its about 40 years ago!), I was a Womble! No, I have no idea which one now, but it was great fun to do.

But yes, like most people who have spent any reasonable amount of time in the acting world, when it comes to clothing, or other outfits, we’re pretty hard to shock. Electric shock might just work, but unless its a decent voltage, with me, well… 😉 And yes, those ECT scenes you see in movies, or on TV (or on You Tube), then yes, I’d love to act one of those, believe me!

So sorry folks, trying to shock me with talk of strange chairs, or strange outfits, you need to try pretty hard lol!

The video, well, it relates to one of those outfits. Some of it is clearly live (the Intro), though I’m not sure how live the singing actually is. And no, sadly, none of said Wombles was me!

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So you fancy being gay? Will bisexual do?

If by any vague chance there are any right wing homophobes reading this, because of the Pence tag, just move on swiftly, because really this isnt for you. Yes, seriously, you wont like it. And just remember, if you like this because of that mention, and you’re a Trump fan, well I might not be the only one laughing.

Fine, warning over.

Yes, in the week of the Presidential Inauguration, and all the talk about whether Trump should be President, or how long he will last as president, lets look at an even more concerning fact for those of LGBT tastes. Yes, you’ve guessed it, Vice President Mike Pence. Because however much you think Trump is only in it for himself (and maybe Putin?), and that will either just chuck it in, or be impeached, be concerned. Because in all truth, the guy who would take over as President is even more crazy than him! The main reason of concern for us LGBT folk with Pence, his beloved belief in Gay Conversion Therapy.

And no, not as my title suggests, this doesnt mean making everyone gay, or even bisexual (which come on, might be fun? 😉 ), but just the opposite. Sorry, dear Mike, but being gay isnt an illness, its a way of life for a lot of people, but you dont want to hear that, do you?

Clearly Pence is in the pay of the electricity companies, because his main method of conversion seems to involve applying large amounts of electricity to various parts of the gay person’s anatomy, principally genitals, and brain. Yes, lovely! Well, fine, ECT research for my latest book might have been handy, but I dont think it would change me sexually all the same. Fine, strictly I’m asexual, but I always tend to say Bi on those boring forms that dont give that option. Thats right, I’m equally not interested in sex with either gender lol! But yes, I’m one of those in the camp that all ECT should be voluntary, and not forced on anyone just because of their sexual inclinations.

The main thing that fascinates me, and makes me wonder about Mr Pence so much, is the fact that all this GCT seems to only be focused on gay men, not lesbian women. Now is this because he secretly finds lesbians a turn on, as seemingly many men do (a recent popular porn search on the ‘bible belt’ states of the US was throwing up lesbian in the top 3 searches), or is this just a denial that wait for it…he’s gay? No, probably not, but those that shout the loudest are often trying to hide something, so…? 😉 Oh, did I mention, a high up GOP male has just been found to be sexting (ghastly term), boys under the age of consent, hmm?

No, dont worry hetro folk, I havent yet come up with a therapy to make everyone bisexual, nor am I working on one, but…?

But just in case by some miracle he reads this, or someone passes it on to him, let me just say, Mike Pence.

I will be in LA for 11 days in May, and in New England for 8 days in September. If you want to try and convert me away from that evil bisexuality of mine, with a dose of ECT, give me a call. You’re paying, and I’d prefer half voltage (I am bi, remember), but yes, if you want to pay for my belated book research, out of your very wealthy pockets, lets go for it!

So yes, America, feel free to impeach Trump, or send him home to Russia, or whatever, but please, send Pence with him! Before anyone says anything, no I am most definitely not a Clinton fan, wouldnt trust the woman as far as I could throw a plane, but compared to Trump…

Right, video time. What will happen when I build my bisexual converter system (I am joking!) for all you hetro folk

Have I got company at night?

Well, I have to wonder, though its definitely not of the living human kind. Nor the cats, I might add, though the latch on my door is strong enough that I’d hear it if it was opened, even a deep sleeper like me. So how do I suspect I have company at night, well, its the TV box that Virgin supply.

I’ll start off by saying that if you dont change channel, or use the TV guide, or anything for a period of 4 hours, it goes into standby mode. Yes, its actually caught me out a few times, when I’m sort of watching something on TV, but at the same time working on my laptop, and not notice the message to warn me about going into standby in 2 minutes, until I’m left in silence, with a dark screen, searching for channels, and yes, I just switch it back on. So even if I forgot to switch it off last thing at night, it would go off 4 hours after I last did anything on it (generally, if I forget, its because there was nothing much on that evening, switched it off early, but didnt turn off box), so with my bed time, by about 3 in the morning (4 hours after my normal bedtime) at the very latest, it would go into standby of its own cause.

So how is it that when I wake up at about 6 in the morning, there are times that I find the box on! No, I dont preset programs to record, mainly because it doesnt work unless the box is actually on nowadays. Not that it matters to me much, beyond a bit of US sport happening overnight, there wouldnt be anything to record then anyway!

The most amusing happening of this occurred earlier this week, when I woke up to find the box already on, so just switched on the TV about 6.30 in the morning. Conveniently, it was on ESPN, which show a couple of fun shows I regularly watch at that time of the morning, so I didnt need to touch the remote at all. About 7.20, the TV went quiet, and I looked up, and lo and behold, the box had gone into standby! So someone, or something switched it on about 3.20 that morning! But who? And no, I’m pretty sure that if an insect conveniently landed on the right button on the remote, it wouldnt be enough to switch it on. And besides, this happens far too often to be something like that! I might add that I’m pretty certain they dont actually watch TV, I dont sleep quite that deeply lol! And yes, the light in the kitchen disturbs me, so the light from the TV, mere feet away from me, absolutely!

Much though I might enjoy the idea that I’ve become of interest to aliens, and they are somehow teleporting into my room, to experiment on me, I should be so lucky! So the obvious answer is something more spectral, but who, and why? And the answer to that, no idea!

The other thing is, whoever, or whatever this is, is either doing things to me, or making me believe they are. The times when this has happened, and I’ve woken with a buzzing in my head, just like an ECT treatment, yes, quite a lot! I know, that might just be my dreams, leading me to believe its happening, but…?

I know, there will be some of you saying ghosts dont exist, but I’d be inclined to disagree, though I’ve never seen this one, but I have felt a presence in my room. But who it is, ghost, or alien, I wish I knew! I’d also love to know why they give themselves away to me, by putting the box on, unless they want me to know!

So, there’s a Saturday night mystery for you to ponder on!

Right, video time. Every so often I like to educate people, by using a group you may not have heard of, but should have done. Tonight is one of those. A Crowded House cover, that mentions dreaming, is the tenuous link!

There are treatments where I say, I wont do that!

Well, fine, I may have tweaked the blog title to fit in with the video, but hey, we’re friends, arent we?

I know, I know, the woman who would love to have an ECT treatment (albeit, lower voltage ideally) saying there are a couple of treatments she really doesnt fancy having, crazy stuff! But fine, electrics is a bit of a kink of mine, blood letting really isnt!

Let me explain:

On my commute to Bradford, I pass a couple of these therapy places, both of which have a treatment that gives me the shudders. Ironically, from what I’ve read, both of these improve the circulation, and both definitely would help with my arthritis, but even so…

The first one, at a place in Bradford, is leech therapy. Yes, you let someone put leeches on your body, and let them have a meal of your blood, while pumping health giving enzymes into you, supposedly. And what I’ve read, its definitely meant to be a good thing for us old ladies, with arthritic joints, but yes, all the same, I’m not sure I could ever let anyone place one (or more) of those leeches on me, and let it feed for an hour or so. I know, they used to be used in hospitals and the like, but even so…I’d need a lot of convincing.

In truth, when I saw the other treatment I’m going to talk about tonight, advertised in Huddersfield, on the wall of a therapy centre, I had no idea what it even was! So yes, I looked it up on Wikipedia, to find out what it was. This:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hijama

Yes, fine, the wet cupping thing might be fine, and I could even live with the funny marks on my skin for a while, but those incisions they then make, into your skin, then draw blood out into the vacuum, eek! I know, I know, if the person doing it knows what they are doing, and their display says they do, then you’re losing less blood (probably?) than when giving a transfusion, but…

In truth, I suspect if someone talked to me about it, and made it seem fine, then I might…just, but if given a free choice, pretty sure the answer is no!

Yes, as I say, this is the woman who would quite happily (if it was the only voltage I could get it done at) have 450 volts pulsed through her brain, for 8 seconds, saying no to something which is probably a lot safer than that might be! Fine, but me, and electric play, majorly serious kink. Having cuts made on my body, or having leeches biting into me, not a kink! Though fine, from all I read, may well do me more good, but I wont do that, without convincing, of a serious degree!

Video time. Fine, I put up a live version of this about 6 months ago, but given that video has been taken down, I feel free to post up the original video this time. One of my favourite songs of all time, I would say

The Commercial Break

Oh please, dont just pass on by, its not like I inflict lots of ads for my stuff on you. Besides which, doing it this way, you still get 2 more blogs this weekend, which wont be adverts for my new book!

Yes, I’ve been writing again, and this time, its something a little bit different. No light and fluffy here, though fine, the ending is pretty sweet, all the same. But just gets a bit grittier, and thought provoking along the way.

Oh, right, the link. https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/667260 is where you need to go. Yes, it is also up at Amazon, and will be up at Barnes And Noble, and a few other places soon, but at the moment, its just those two, and Kobo, so…Yes, fine, I’ll admit it, Smashwords pay far better commission than Amazon, which is why I’m featuring them. But if you love Amazon, just go there, search on Merry Brooks, and you’ll find it there too.

Yes, as mentioned, this isnt your sort of cute story that ‘Miss Brooks’ has written before, because it tackles a subject that interests, and intrigues me, but has the same effect on people as Marmite, seemingly you love it, or hate it, only in this case, it seems more fall into the latter. So, my positive look at ECT (Electro Convulsive Therapy) is going to annoy some folk, for sure! Hopefully some will agree with me though. As to the modern style of treatment, its very different to what you see in the movies! Best example I can come up with, is this one. I know, its in Dutch, but I cant do everything. Let me make a film in English, with me as the patient, and I’ll do it, willingly!

I know what you might be saying, she’s putting forward a positive case for it, but if she had to have it herself… Sorry, I would, happily, though fine, ideally, at first at least, I might prefer a lower voltage passing through my mind than a standard treatment, but if that was the only choice, then yes, I would, definitely! In fact, if anyone is offering…?

Anyway, the story, though you can read it in the synopsis on the link, a quick resume. Susan is a great believer in method acting, and likes to know how her roles would react to events. So when she is offered the chance to play a wealthy lady, whose children want her out of the way, in a psychiatric unit, while they blow her money, she needs to find out what that would be like, for real. And fine, because the children dont want her out too soon, they plan on getting her ‘treated’ in a way that will keep her there for a while. So, a stay is booked, though Susan plans to avoid the treatment, but…

Yes, its a role, yes, its fiction, and no actresses were harmed in the making of this story lol! Fine, I wouldnt mind being ‘harmed’ that way, but anyway…

So yes, if you want to make me happy, go give the book a try. Better, buy it, its only $2.99, and you have no idea how good it is to see your books sell a few copies. If not for you, go check out my other books, and maybe buy one of those instead?

OK, publicity moment over, which means its time for the video! Or tonight, two videos! Yes, same group, same song, so take your pick. Firstly, the original video

Then, a recent live performance, which proves that they can still do it live, about 40 years later!

Yes, you like the name of the group, which is why I used it? An amazing pair of brothers, it has to be said.

One of these days, it wont be just talk!

One thing you quickly discover with the internet is that a lot of people are all talk, and no action. In other words, they come up with these interesting (to me at least) ideas, but when people actually show an interest in it, they just disappear again, as fast as they arrived. Yes, this looks like another one, much to my disappointment. Just over a week ago, over at Fembot Central, this headline appeared on a thread

An idea for actual conversion, looking for willing subjects!

So, unsurprisingly enough, I showed cautious interest. No, not cautious as in, do I want to be converted into a robot, because the answer clearly is yes! Even if its more of an organic, controlled robot, than anything more deliciously cybernetic, its a start!

His answers started impressively, answers clearly thought through for many issues, and not what I would call beyond potentially possible nowadays. Yes, EEG Caps, and Brain/Computer interface devices, rather than transformation pods, which fine, I would love, but practically, not going to happen for a while yet, in real life!

Anyway, after a weekend of dealing with the matter, seemingly quite professionally, everything has since gone quiet. So yes, I’m assuming it was never beyond a theory in his head, and is never going to happen in reality. Great shame, but am I totally surprised by this? No, not really! I’d love to be proved wrong, believe me I wouldnt, but I’m beginning to suspect he will never be seen, in a meaningful way again. I did send him a message on Skype, just to get a reply that he was trying to check on a couple of things, and would get back to me, but that was Tuesday, and not heard a thing! No, no plans to contact again, and no expectations of hearing anything now, either.

Fine, I was impressed when I saw it, though I couldnt see the practicality of someone controlling several (as was his plan) organic fembots on a long term basis, but I had to hope. Ah well…

On semi related news, the new book is progressing. I have the edited copy back, and if I can work out a way to buy the cover for it, it could be close to release. Snag is, due to the collapse of the pound, due to the Brexit campaign, I havent quite got enough on my pre paid credit card to pay $7 for the image. Minimum top up is £30 ($40), and the finances really arent solid enough this month for that, but fine, its going to be done, I guess?

Why is it related? Well, there is this thing, that generally, when creating robots, it involves a nice zap of electricity to the mind, or at least in the movies it does lol! And yes, a little bit of zapping might just be happening in my story, though not to transform anyone into a robot. Having got into the whole subject of ECT, its no surprise I decided to develop it into a story. I know, might hurt some sales, but might make others, who knows? Tackling something different might even prove to be a breakthrough moment? More likely make a few sales, and that will be it, knowing my luck! Yes, when available, I will advertise it, believe me!

In case anyone was wondering, no, I never got to do any more research on ECT treatment than I could find online. And I hate to break it to people who are against ECT, but the stuff you see in the movies, isnt general treatment nowadays! Yes, even a placebo walk through would have been helpful, and I did try for that. Not surprised I got no reply from local NHS, but I gave it a go. Yes, a low voltage session might have been even more informative, but practically, I wasnt expecting to get offered that! Bit like the guy offering to turn me into an organic robot, was never likely to happen!

Right, video time. You could jokingly say how a robot might think, especially an organically based one!

The Long And Winding Road

Yes, at this point, finally, I’m looking at the end of a certain long, and winding road, called the hunt for a new job. I know, strictly, there have been a couple of false starts along the way, both relating to a firm I couldnt praise, called Capita, but that battle is now over. One at least, was a complete write off, the other, just an event of unfortunate timing, but I cant say that even then, as an employer, they’ve impressed me.

So yes, Monday, the new challenge begins, and one I’m actually looking forward to. An interesting sounding job, a new commute, which is cheaper than Leeds, and a better wage than Capita were ever going to offer, for sure. I guess that at some point, maybe I’ll get tired of the commute to Bradford, but it will take quite a while for that to happen, for sure.

In theory (ha ha), before then I’ll be a wife, and mother, in sunny California, but I will not be holding my breath on that front. Or who knows, the new story might make me a world famous author, on a controversial issue, but I suspect thats even less likely! Yes, I’ve written a new story, about 10,000 words long, involving an ECT session that maybe should, or shouldnt have happened? It will be going off to my wonderful editor shortly, and then, when I get it back, and when I can afford to buy a cover picture (next weekend, hopefully), I’ll let it take its chances. Mind, dont look for Merry Brooks as the author, it will be under another name, TBA, because its not her usual stuff.

But yes, if you’ve told me back in April 2015, that it would only be now, that I would finally be seeing that road to a job, ending next Monday, I would have groaned. But finally, I’m there.

The video, yes, the title makes it pretty obvious, really. Officially its Wings, in truth, its just Paul McCartney

Can Anyone Help With Some Research?

Yes, its one of my story ideas, which I could do with some research help on, and I was just wondering if anyone knew someone, who could help me out with it. Where’s a good place to start? I guess the story summary I did for someone else, is a bit of a guide

So far I’ve written purely what is a summary piece, about 3,000 words, to get the base idea out on a few sites, and get a reaction to it. Introduces an actress heavily into method acting, regardless of the role. Gets offered a role playing a patient in a psychiatric hospital, who would be ‘seen’ to be having ECT in the role on stage, and wants to know what its like.
Her agent should arrange her a visit to a unit, to see the set up, and how to react to it. Unfortunately (or otherwise), he doesn’t pass on the correct info, and they think she wants to experience it for real. Plan is to take issues, and everything else forward from there, how she reacts to it, how they react when they discover she wasn’t meant to be treated, and everything else.
Pretty much I want to do some research, ideally from experience, to help with writing it, see life from the other side of the electrodes, and all that. Also would then be able to gauge how she would react to that first session, and everything, if I knew what it was like.
As I say, maybe less than full voltage, and duration, but enough to know what its like. But if I have to do a full session, I definitely would!

In fact, someone suggested to me that it might interest TV/film people as a script, if sufficiently developed, which would be even more amazing for me, and I might look into that, but for now, lets leave it as a story concept.

Yes, I know, slightly crazy, maybe to be interested in having something like this done to me, at any voltage, or duration, but unless I know what it feels like, how am I going to write it? Fine, yes, it also has appeal, lets face it, as a personal thing, as it will surprise no one who knows how much I’d enjoy having my brain ‘zapped’ like that, to some degree. Mind, equally, if anyone can give me a detailed guide to what being on the receiving side of ECT feels like, it would help. But yes, fine, I’d love to find out for myself, I really would.

As stated, it doesnt have to be standard voltage (about 450 volts), or duration (up to 8 seconds), though if thats all that can happen, I’ll take my chance, and do it. But yes, ideally, something less (principally voltage) than that would be fine, as long as I get the sensation, the after reaction to it, and everything else, to get it written down afterwards.

Oh fine, maybe the story idea came to me, because I watch the wrong type of videos on You Tube, but anyway, here’s a fine example

Alright, faults with this, as its a movie scene. Voltage, and milliamperes, way higher than really used, or so websites tell me, at least. Duration, I time it at 14 seconds, and pretty much the longest said to be used is 8 seconds! So fine, she wasnt really zapped, but these things make it look more dramatic than reality. In truth, duration wise, this one is even more crazy! Again, fake, mind.

So yes, I’m looking for something a bit more sane than those, for my research lol! But yes, though I might secretly enjoy something like those, in reality, I’ll settle for something that lets me know what its like, with as little risk as possible. I know, something like this, there is no such thing as no risk, but even so…

But yes, if anyone can help me with research, in any way, please email me, at stephmajor8@hotmail.com and let me know. I know, but we writers have some crazy ideas, and fantasies, sometimes.

The video, a strange piece I found, suitable subject matter