No, I’m not really being serious about cosmetic surgery, though equally, if anyone is offering to pay for a pair for me, lets talk, it might be fun!
As anyone who knows me well, or has read many of these will know, I look like I’ve got a quite decent cleavage. Nothing ridiculous, but not flat chested either. But no, I’ve never had any assistance up top, of the surgery kind, even though I must admit, but for the cost, it might just be fun. Nothing crazy, but a nice pair of B, or C cups, internally, might be fun.
No, what I use too attract the male eye, and it works, is the same sort of prosthesis that women who have had a mastectomy use. Being silicon, they feel about the right weight, they give about the right bounce, and yes, they give me a nice form, and figure, and I suspect, that extra wiggle when walking.
The snag with them is that the covering isnt the most resilient thing in the whole world, so they have to be looked after with a bit of care. Which is one reason I have a foam pair for sleeping in bed. But with reasonable care, and not over stressing them, they last quite well.
Of course, the snag was, when I had the seizures in Blackpool, I was wearing them. Only snag with this was, they left me to sleep on my side, which put pressure on my right breast, and yes, the skin of the breast didnt stand the strain, and began to leak. To be honest, I’d had them a while, so it wasnt the end of the world that I had to buy a new pair as replacements.
Yes, then we had the second bout of seizures, and yes, you’ve guessed it, the same situation has arisen again. The left is fine, the right, not so! Trouble is, when you’ve got less money coming in, these things arent cheaper, even if they’re a lot cheaper than surgery lol!
To be honest, for the last few weeks, I’ve been sort of playing the ‘Catch 22’ scenario, that hopefully gets sorted on Tuesday. If the inevitable happens on Tuesday, then I’ve made the comment that I’m going to complete transition, medical permission granted. And lets face it, those nice female hormones are going to make my ‘boobies’ bigger anyway, I’m sure. But being honest, I’m not likely to start the day after the news is confirmed, though I doubt it will take long to get started, if honest with myself.
So yes, its more the cost, and seizure thing at present. If I buy another (I could just get a right one, I gather), how long to the next seizure? Hopefully never, but realistically…?
I must admit, the other thing that would make an internal boost more fun, is the dresses I could then wear. Currently, I have to be careful with what I wear (and reveal), because however good these prostheses are, they arent a perfect match to flesh. But if I had them internally, oh, couldnt I be ‘naughty’? Ah well…
I suspect, like most things at present, I’m going to wait and see what I’m told on Tuesday, then make a choice. Not the surgery, I’m sure, short of a lottery win, or a wealthy benefactor, but other than that…? But I must admit, one of the things pushing me on to transition is the thought I can wear sexier clothing, as I wont have to worry about revealing cleavage (can enjoy doing so, in fact), or the thing that a women shouldnt have! Yes, naughty girl! I swear its the outrageous actress in me, but besides that…
OK, video time. When I was growing up in the 80’s, there was one pair of boobs that were seemingly more famous than any others. She tried a brief, but unmemorable music career, and this is from that!
Firstly, let me say that the title is simply a play on the video song, I have no idea what the lady who is mentioned here, as to what her name was! Secondly, for the few who dont know, and are saying the blog is by Stevie Lou, not Harlean, its one of my transition names, now gone.
Well, summer has most definitely come over here at long last, the weather is glorious, and hot, and my back is thrilled by all that. Beyond a short trip out to get my meds supply earlier today, I havent worn a back brace all day, and its been heaven! Just shows how much heat does my back good, I guess? Fingers crossed the works syndicate was the lucky winner of the £17.9 million on the lottery last Saturday, because if so, I’ll be house hunting soon, somewhere warm. Dont think that idiot Trump will let me move to US, unless I marry, or something, but any offers, lol? No, pigs flying is more likely, on both counts!
So, given the wonderful weather, I’ve gone totally into summer mode, when at home at least, and I’m typing this in a short (above knees, ooh!), 20’s flapper style dress, in a glorious shade of pink. Sadly, I dont know if its the bra (slightly push up), or the dress, but it seems determined to show off my cleavage, and given they are prosthetic’s (vanity, darlings), I cant really flash them to the general public. But no, in truth, I’m not sure if, at my age, I’m prepared to flash this much leg in public, anyway! So, no, sadly, wont be work wear, lol! I know, could be done, but… especially when…
I was coming home from work last night, on the 7.20 bus from Bradford to Huddersfield. I know nothing surprising in that, other than maybe the fact it turned up! On said bus, when I got on, was a woman of my age (or slightly older), who had one of those dresses that you pull up over your boobs (in her case, no bra, unless it was bandeau), and hope it stays there! Yes, why not? And indeed, why not? What really got me though, was when she went to get off the bus. The factor I couldnt see before then, was the bottom of the dress. Lets just say it just about covered her rear!
So is it her thats got it wrong, and that women of our maturity should be a little bit more ‘modest’ than that, or is it me that has it wrong for thinking women in their 60’s shouldnt wear short, revealing dresses like that? Oh fine, I thought, for at least 2 seconds about wearing this dress out to the pharmacy, before deciding no! Now, whether that was due to length at all, or simply the cleavage issue, I decided against it. Yes, I might have thought about it longer, but for the cleavage issue, but even so…
So am I right, or am I just a little too modest for my own good, you tell me! Not that anyone will, I cant remember the last time I got a comment on here, though I usually get a few on Facebook!
Right, video time. It was a toss up between this, and a Kinks song, but voted for this, in the hope I can use the latter later in the summer. Not only do you get Rod, you get the DJ legend that was John Peel too! Yes, this is very much mimed, lol!
Well, for those of you who read this on a regular basis, and I know there are some, this features a bit of an update on the last blog. In that, you might remember me mentioning about just maybe wearing my enhancers to work, and seeing what happened reaction wise? Well I did, and the reaction, absolutely zero! So no idea if they think its surgery or not!
Now whether this is because no one has noticed, or more likely because no one has the guts to say anything, I have no idea, the jury (thats me!) is out on that one at present. I’m assuming its more the latter, but nothing would surprise me at that place. Put it this way, I have no plans now not to wear them, unless I’m told otherwise. And yes, I’m seeing more of the assumption that if I’ve got boobs, I must be a woman, however butch lol! Admittedly they are slightly camouflaged by the coat at this time of the year, especially in a winter coat, but they are pretty obvious all the same. They certainly are at lunchtime, and no great reaction then either! Alright, I’m not doing a Dolly Parton type look, but I’m certainly bursting out a bit with them in, all the same. I’m not sure how it will all play out in the summer, when you dont need a coat, or just a thin one, but for now, I have no plans to stop then. Funnily enough, I can try out the theory in April, in Seattle, when no one will know me, and rain permitting, I shouldnt need a coat all the time, and can see what reaction they, sorry, I get.
The difference I’m noticing is the weight factor, for want of a better term. They might only weigh about 260g for the pair, but when you’re wearing them 24/7 (well alright, not in bath, havent found a way around that yet lol), I notice it far more than when it was about half the time, probably because I never get a break from carrying them on my chest. I know, a real woman doesnt get that break, but hey, for a long while, i didnt have that delight to worry about. How a really busty woman copes, I dont know, but she has my admiration. I know one thing, I feel liberated wearing them full time though.
Interesting thing, I always assumed because of the gels/liquids rule at airport security, that wearing silicone enhancers through there, and for flights wouldnt be permitted, but it seems I’m wrong there, apparently its fine, even with the TSA. I know, I checked! Seemingly what I read on one Transgender Forum, the only no-no is carrying them in hand luggage. Wearing them is fine, checked luggage is fine (done that a few times), just not carry on. Personally, thats not an option I’d even consider, I’d either pack them in the case, or be wearing them anyway! And now seemingly, wearing them is the most wonderful, and finest option for me.
Just a quick add, it seems it might not be so easy when travelling to Canada, or more correctly, from Canada. Though I do wonder what they do if you are leaving the country anyway! Does that mean they have to provide you with an apartment and job if they wont let you out lol?
Alright, the video. Going with the change of look thing here, even if Geri’s was a bit more radical than mine at the time. But I do think the line, “What you see is what you are getting.” so sums me up nowadays. Being buxom is definitely fun, and the world hasnt ended yet because of it lol!
To Leeds in my case, lol! Its been so long that I’ve almost forgotten by now! Only kidding, especially as I’ve been through there twice while on holiday. But its certainly been a while since I went to work, I suspect the email box will take some sorting out, mainly from stuff that will be totally irrelevant by now! Though the song might mention another city, somehow.
Yes, its back to work in the morning, and in the worst way possible, got to be at my desk for 8 am, and that means being up by about 4.45 in the morning, thats going to come as one major shock to the system, believe me! So alright, in one sense I’m just about ready to go back now, its just that tomorrow’s timing is not the way that I’d fancy doing so!
Its actually been a really nice break, for a stay at home one, and have got a lot of things done, some decent shopping trips, and more pleasingly, plenty of writing too. I admit it, at one point I’d got jaded with writing, but I’ve tried a different style of late, and am really enjoying it. Time is still going to be an issue for writing, but at least I will be more inclined to grab my opportunities now. But no, its not something I’m likely to post here lol! :p
So alright, I’m a minx, I did a Facebook posting today, hinting at having had a boob job, maybe you’ve seen it if you come from there? No, I havent, but after over 8 days of nigh continuous enhancer wearing, it feels like I have. (Not for baths, or massage, but all the rest of the time…) I am going to miss them tomorrow, not only for the shape, but I suspect the weight as well by now. I might yet go with them to work, but somehow I suspect management wouldnt get the joke, or like it, so probably not. I suspect I have the right to, but dont quote me on that? Anyone got a spare £4K or so lying around, then I really could give work a nice surprise!
And yes, for good, or bad, depending on your opinion, you might get less blogs again now for a while. I assume if you’re reading this, that fact will be bad, but…?
OK, dont worry about the street map of Leeds, I’m sure I’ll find my way! 😉
Alright, the video, Frankie Goes To Hollywood. They seemed to find their way to the top of the charts often enough, but this wasnt a single, which explains the basic video. And oh, I do know the way to San Jose (California), been there a couple of times, quite a nice place.
I have to admit it, my assumption was always that going with my natural cleavage (however tiny) was a safer route than being out there, using enhancers as a buxom old lady, but maybe I was looking at it from the wrong direction?
Yes, as some know, if they read this regularly, I’m on holiday this week. And lets face it, Girls just want to have fun, as Cyndi Lauper used to say, and no, thats not the video lol! So this week, all my trips out have been of the ‘fully stacked’ kind, and I’ve been surprised by the reaction, or rather the lack of it. Is it in human nature to assume that if someone is ‘well built’ that they must be female, even if other little details may suggest otherwise? Yes James, I know, before you say it that I have a decent pass rate, but even so…well, I was expecting a few funny looks at least, but no, not really happening. And yes, I still get a few when out with just my natural cleavage, which is why I was wondering whether it is the big boobs that do it, or not? Do men, and indeed women see them and assume, decent cleavage, must be a woman, which doesnt happen so much with my natural decolletage?
Or is it just that the people of Yorkshire are more open minded than I thought?
I admit it, on Facebook I jokingly posted about telling work I was getting a ‘boob job’ done this week, wearing the enhancers next Tuesday (my first day back, as Monday is one of my 2 days off next week) and seeing what reaction I got. Typically of our management, and indeed the other staff, that opportunity never arose. Management probably because they dont really care, other staff because we were so manic on Sunday (understaffed, what a shock!) that they didnt have time, assuming they cared anyway! To be honest, if I could keep a straight face, it might be tempting to do it anyway, but I doubt I would. This time of year you’re so wrapped up in coats and things, that no one would probably notice before work anyway! I think they might notice at work, but dont quote me on that with some of them lol!
The ‘fun’ would be lunchtime, out on the street. And in the shop where I get my lunch most days, they know how ‘big’ I am after all! And 2 cups is a lot to grow, even by plastic surgery I suspect? I know, if I had it done, I would develop somewhat, but that much? Its an issue I admit to being torn on, I like just rolling with my natural development, it makes me proud that I have decent breasts of my own, despite a lack of help from Leeds GIC. But at the same time, bigger boobies are nicer, though am I then just being fake?
I may well be able to pull it off (pardon the expression) most of the year, though I suspect summer Friday and Saturday evenings might not always be fun, given the number of idiots about then. And if I do it, I wouldnt want to pick and choose, I either need to be smallish B cup all the time, or well developed C cup all the time, that would only be fair on work and things.
I have no plans to not use the enhancers before I go back to work, the only time they will come off is for bathing etc, they arent designed for that, or for wearing without a bra lol! But otherwise…Well I wouldnt mind the enhancers making it impossible for me to remove them, but hey, they only happens in fiction, and the movies lol!
OK, the video, lets do something transgender related. I only know of 2 songs that openly talk about transgender women, and neither of them recent. One is Lola, by the Kinks, the other is…
How many work it out before clicking the link, I wonder? A look at the tags might give it away I guess?
There is, as far as I know, one time when I couldnt use enhancers, while flying. I assume as they are made of silicon, that they wouldnt pass any security tests, especially the TSA ones, given I fly to the US a lot? Unless someone wants to make me a foam pair, I assume they would be fine?
No, I dont mean getting a full head of blonde hair (quite literally) by any means, allegedly with Dolly its a wig anyway. I vaguely remember her owning up to that fact, but please dont quote me on that. To be honest, that much hair for real would really be a maintenance job, and I’m not sure if I’m up to that anyway.
Nor, unless someone else is paying for it, do I mean a Dolly P type boob job, though those at least are natural for her. I have to suspect they must weigh heavy at times though. Alright, I would mind being a full B, or medium C cup naturally, or even by cheating, if I didnt have to pay for it, but its not going to happen I guess, so…?
No, what I do mean is I’m working 9 till 5 on Wednesday, my next day at work. Yes, I’m off tomorrow, yay! When you think about it, thats one thing that has really changed in the last 30 years since the film was made, working hours. Back then that was standard office hours, whereas now, almost anything goes. Heck, my shifts come in anywhere between 8 am, and 9.30 pm, and the centre stays available till 10.30! The other factor that has changed dramatically since then is the working week. That was the point, it was Monday to Friday, 9 till 5, and that went for most office workers. Now I suspect people who get all weekends and bank holidays off must be almost in the minority! But as someone who has spent most of her working life in the betting industry, I’m used to it, my culture shock was working only Monday to Friday at my previous job!
And yes, I know one respondent here will point out he has to work every Sunday lol!
Anyway, in the absence of offers of a Dolly wig, or a paid for Dolly type boob job, lets head for the video. Anyone who hasnt worked out what this might be, well…
And yes, I will probably sing this to myself at least once on Wednesday!
So alright, thats a slight exaggeration over here at present, but in terms of this winter at least, its beginning to feel that way.
No, no snow as yet, though plenty of frost, it must be said. It has now barely struggled above freezing, but only just, and at 2 in the afternoon, its not going to stay that way for long! Mind, given that 1 Facebook friend in Fairbanks, Alaska has been reporting temperatures well into minus fahrenheit (think it was -42 yesterday), we really havent got anything by dropping down to the balmy climes of mid twenties lol!
The trains did fail to run yesterday morning, but that was down to signal failure, not due to three grains of snow on the line! But give them time, I’m sure that will happen! Thankfully, as you might gather from this, I’m off today, so can avoid the cold. Unfortunately I’ve got to be in work tomorrow for 8 am, so I’m going to notice the cold then! I’m not looking forward to being up before 5, believe me!
I also know that its going to get worse before it gets better, and compared to many areas of the world, this is a mere cakewalk. But for us wimpy Brits…lol! But yes, I’d still love the chance to work in the North Eastern corner of the US/Canada all the same, despite the temperatures, and weather there. Seattle might be nicer though lol!
I hope the weather is better the week after next when I’m off, but knowing my luck, it will be 6 inches of snow then! I’d hate to have to arrange a ‘boob job’ for the week as the only alternative to being indoors all the time lol!
Alright, weather whinge over, for now at least. Whats that, music video, did you say? Well the title is a dead giveaway, or it should be by now at least given my style with the postings I do. The artist, well… Think carefully about which blonde I’d love to look like, and which era is the ‘age’ of said look I’d love to be. Got it? If not, click the magic button and find out
Oh, go on, be a devil and click the link anyway!
Its fair to say nowadays that I’m pretty happy with most of my body, even more so given that no hormones have been involved in this transformation, though I do wonder if hypnosis has somehow activated all those female hormones laying latent within me, and brought about some amazing changes.
So alright, my boobs arent huge, but then again, a number of natural women arent really any bigger than me, though possibly they have more of a full curve than mine do at present, but quite possibly they are getting there. And maybe the waist and hips ratio isnt perfect, but its not bad either! The chin and hairline, well they arent doing badly either. So all in all, seemingly for a good majority of people, if not more, I seem to pass as a woman. Of course the irony is that you only hear when people dont think you pass generally, because otherwise, lets face it, why would you say anything to a woman about looking like a woman?
So it comes down to one thing that annoys me about my body, irony is, I’m generally the only one that sees it! But even so, yes, the penis lurking down there does annoy somewhat! And yes, I would love to be able to hide it from view, if not more.
The one thing you never know with these blogs, is who your readers are. Alright, I have a good idea about some (yes James, that does include you lol), but others, well you dont know who they are, or what their talents are. There may be no doctors, designers, inventors or otherwise, but if you dont ask, you dont find out.
So to the medical readers, the question is, is there some way of raising the penis and balls (surgically or otherwise) so that they either disappear completely from sight, or pretty much do so. All I’m interested in is enough to make going to the toilet possible, and beyond that,…and lets face it, a girl should have labia lips anyway. Complete change would be great, but as I’ve said before, I’ve really not the fight at my age to take on the Leeds NHS again, and that would all take time anyway, and at my age, well, the sooner something changes, the better.
Designers, inventors, whatever you wish to be called, this next bit is for you. Could something be designed to fit over the penis and balls in such a way as to just leave an opening for toilet needs, and nothing more? And by this, I mean something that can be worn pretty much on a permanent basis, not the odd day here or there. I know its covered up, but it would be lovely if when I lowered the pants, I didnt see him there!
And no, not looking for a freebie or anything, though I wouldnt say no, but dont expect it. If the gadget, or ‘surgery’ really worked, then it would be more than worth the cost, simply because its the only thing I need to get done for a pretty remarkable change to a natural woman anyway. Or at least the look of one, as bits would not get removed (presumably?) of course.
So, if the right person reads this, or someone who does, and knows the right person who could, then please let me know. Oh, and if any wealthy benefactor out there wants to buy me a boob job for Christmas lol…not sure I want them huge, just fuller really, but…I cant afford, or justify the cost to myself, thats for sure. They at least are blooming, more important to me is the disappearance of something else, if only from visible sight.
Oh, dont worry, the video is coming, I do wonder how many look at these choices too? Maybe this is a bit cheeky, as I’m not natural, or even post op, but it certainly works for me as my mindset at least