In truth, given that accordingly to the stats at least, the vast majority of my readers are in the US, I’m probably expecting as big a response to this as, well, not a lot, but if I give enough notice? No, even then, lol, I dont expect American, Delta, Virgin or anyone else to be bombarded with applicable flight bookings from US!
The first time I heard a bell ring in the reception area at the hospital in Leeds, on the floor where the radiotherapy sessions are done, I wondered what was going on. But fine, being a ‘nosy bitch’, at a suitable moment, I went to find out what it was all about. What it was all about is that at the end of a significance part of your treatment process (mainly last radiotherapy session), people are gently encouraged to ring said bell, to signify the significant moment to others. Yes, you’re right, I’m planning to do it.
Well, to give all a clue, my last session is booked for the 6th December, at 12.05 pm, so if all goes to plan, I reckon I will be ringing said bell about 12,20 pm or so (believe me, timing will be approximate) at St James Hospital, Leeds to signify the end of the sessions, and more exhaustively for me at present, the end of travelling to and from Leeds every day for 6 weeks (which I am currently finding harder, lol) at varying hours of the day! Then starts the 4 week recovery period, in which there are a couple of nice events (and no, Boris, I dont mean the General Election) happening, one of which should be pretty obvious to all, lol.
But yes, if anyone should want more details on venue, time, or other things, feel free to comment, or email at email@example.com and I will provide them happily. Though if you do the former, please provide an email address, if I dont already have one for you.
No, I’m not expecting a rush, or indeed anyone really to turn up from here, but now you’ve got 4 weeks to plan, check your calendar, or whatever you need to do. Yes, if anyone turns up who has video (even via a mobile phone) facilities, I might post my first video on You Tube, instead of just watching them, lol. But no, I dont have one, so…? Oh, you will need to get yourself there, just saying…
I know, no response, but the offer is made! And now I’ll offer the video, lol. Some may even have worked it out from the title!
Well, indirectly, though they wont know about it at the time,yes, they will.
Assuming that the fairly obvious is correct, and after the bone density scan, they do decide that my issue with my back is osteoporosis related, there are a couple of fairly obvious supplements I could be given to try and ease, and hopefully cure the issue, to some degree at least. One is calcium supplements, which would help to strengthen the bone, which I’m pretty sure is needed. The other one, and more relevant to this blog, is (o)estrogen supplements, as would be given to menopausal women under these circumstances. Yes, I’m sort of doing the double spelling thing here, as both options seem equally used, though I will settle for the estrogen version from now on, when writing this. In fact, its quite possible, and some say quite likely that I will get both!
One thing I’ve always said is that if the situation arose, where I felt the need, or desire to have the actual Sex Reassignment Surgery (SRS), then I would get it done. In truth, the main reason I’ve put myself off it, is the surgery issue, I’m not one of those people who love pain, in that sense at least! So given I have no sexual desires, and no partner, or potential partner who wants to get close in that way with me, I’ve passed on the matter, up to now.
But yes, I have had a think about it, and I’ve come to the conclusion that if a doctor, or group of doctors think I should be on estrogen supplements, then maybe I should take that as a hint that I really ought to take that last step to womanhood after all. I know, its still going to hurt, but I’m not sure it could be much more hellish than the pain I went through before getting on serious painkillers for the fracture in my back. And hey, lets face it, if anyone ever actually enters my new vagina sexually, I will be amazed. But yes, going to meet my maker, as a proper woman, it would be nice, I must admit.
But equally, I’m not going to be the one that actually makes the decision for me, as in truth, I’ve got a life now that suits me fine. All my paperwork says I’m a woman, and thats the main thing for me, but all the same…? So yes, if I get put on estrogen supplements, for my osteoporosis, I’m going to take that as a signal from a doctor, or ‘higher person’ that I really ought to become a woman for real. I know, a proper get out, but at least this way, I know its destiny, if it happens, which is fine by me.
I suspect its fair to say that therefore, a number of people will be hoping that the doctors do decide to put me on estrogen, so I go ahead and do it. There might be one or two hoping otherwise, but I suspect the vast majority who know me, and know about me would love to see me do it. Hell, I’d probably be glad I did it, after its done, but just at the moment, yes, the pain issue concerns me!
But yes, if in about 6 weeks time, or so, I announce that the decision is estrogen supplements for me, and I try to get out of this, dont let me! An angel will have contemplated my fate, made that decision for me, so…it will be done! Mind, unless someone wants to pay for me to do it privately, the length of time it might take on the NHS, well who knows when it will actually happen lol?
Oh fine, I might have given a couple of clues to the video here. This is a delightful live version, from the concert in Manchester that happened after the awful events there at a concert earlier this year.
When I say I have a wonderful friend in Colorado, I mean the type of friend that 20 years ago, I would never have dreamed of having. Yes, the online type. If you’d told me back then that we would talk to, and feel we know people, halfway across the world, that I’ve never met, nor am I likely to meet, and I would have laughed at you back then. Now, its seemingly the most natural thing to have. To be fair, the number of people who I have never met, or only met because of the magic of the internet, is an amazingly high number, especially for a more mature lady like me. But yes, I’ve been blessed to meet to, or pass words with so many of them. There are a pair of people (James, and Kate, for example) in the NE of the US who are very special to me, and they know it. As to others I’ve either met briefly (Tina and Eden, again for examples), or currently, am yet to meet (Stacie, Penny, and Diane amongst many), they’ve played a part in my life, both online, and real.
Well, anyway, Diane is an author, far more talented than me. I would say go to her website, and buy something, but I’m not going to force you to. But if you want to take a look, go to http://www.banditsranch.com/ and do so.
Anyway, last month, she had a contest, to tie into a giveaway she had (at time of writing, its on her home page), and I took my chance. I didnt expect to win, but I like to support her as much as I can, given I’m not in a position to go on a book buying spree at present. So I took my chance, and wrote something. To my surprise, and delight, when I switched my computer on yesterday morning, I had received a magical reading from her, and my angels. Honoured, and delighted, you have no idea!
No, I’m not going to quote you all the details, if anyone does want to see it, comment, with an address, and I’ll send it on. But yes, I’m told I need to wipe my slate clean, and look forward to my fresh life, in my future. Oh fine, I’d like my slate quite literally wiped clean, but as far as I know (sadly), brainwashing isnt yet a practical option, if only it was. But those angels are keen to work on my dreams, and make my life in future, so much better! I know, given much of the last year, not hard, but lets not reflect on that. Funnily enough, I got one of those silly Facebook milestones this morning, which reminded me that just over 8 years ago (given the time it would have taken to get the pictures) was actually the first time I worked as a woman! Yes, its happened a lot of times since then, for sure!
I know, I know, not every reader here will believe in angels, and the like, and everyone is free to believe what they wish. So if you want to believe its true, fine. Equally, if you want to believe its just me being soft again, thats fine too. In recent times, I’ve also been asked if I believe in Aliens, Ghosts, and Witches, and said yes to all 3! Not because I’ve met any, but…I believe they’re out there somewhere!
But what I am sure of, despite all the talk, is that the internet can be a wonderful place to make very special friends, and that is true. Yes, it can also be a dangerous place, but for me, I know who are in the majority at least.
Right, video time. Yes, the obvious one, even more so, given the blog title is a line of the lyrics.