OK, I dont really mean it, unless you really want to, but it fits in with the video, so…?
Tomorrow is the International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia and Transphobia. So, yes, giving you a bit of warning, so dont say I didnt tell you. Hopefully at least some knew already, but just in case…? And yes, its better than getting me started on Alabama, and Georgia, and now seemingly Missouri, so… No, seriously, dont!
Its funny, this year will be the least I’ve done for this in a few years, but such is the state of my health. Doesnt mean I wont be at home supporting the cause, but still going to be funny not doing something for the department, or the civil service, or anything more this week. And yes, my usual disclaimer, please people, lets make it so we dont have to do this sort of thing any more, OK? Sadly at the moment things seems to be getting worse, not better! Of course those that need to be educated the most will be the ones not reading this, I guess?
I know, its easy for me to say, given I’m Bi, Trans/Intersex, and support all others affiliated in all the letters mentioned generally, but I dont get the Phobia. Firstly, its us, its who we are, so just live with it! Secondly, unless some evil scientist has come up with an evil virus that no one has told me about, you cant catch LGBTI+ from those of us that already are. So just relax, OK?
Oh, and as for the whole toilet thing, I dont know about some, but I go in there for one reason, to use the toilet, wash my hands (see, no gay infection issue, lol), and then get on with that boring thing called normal life. And to all those who say you should use the toilet relating to your genitals, well, I have girl bits, so I’m entitled to use the ladies, and not the gents, OK? Snag is, I also boy bits, so I’m entitled to use the gents, but not the ladies. Does that mean I can use either, neither, or what? And think carefully before answering incorrectly, and making yourself look an idiot. Yes, going to stick to using the ladies, as I have for nearly 10 years now!
PS, if anyone knows a pain free way to remove the boy bits, and tidy up the girl bits for me, feel free! Alternatively, a non sexual cyborg/robot body, complete with either assisting AI, or full interface, or control, even better, due to my current brain function issues.
But other than that, I just request people to treat IDAHOBIT day tomorrow, and the people it related to nicely, not just tomorrow, but forever. OK, plea over.
Video time. For the second time this week, in tribute to the late, great Doris Day, one of her song. I know, its cutely straight, but just change the u, to an a, and… 😉
Its funny how things change, isnt it? If you think it through, as I did today, when I did the whole name, and gender change thing at work (well in the sense of becoming a Ms at least, if not the physical change), everyone in my department, and to a lesser degree, at work, had known me as a man. Well, maybe thats pushing it, I’d certainly gone with an androgyne look from day 1 at this place, but that was making it official, that I was now a woman.
But of course, since then, people have come, people have gone, and I suspect there is now a decent percentage in our office department at least, who have never known me as anything but a woman. Indeed, there is now an ever growing percentage of those who have never known me without cleavage! I suspect it will never reach a point where no one knew the old me, but I guess as time moves on, that percentage will drop ever more.
Occasionally I will still hear Steve, or he, but its pretty rare nowadays, and is generally followed by an embarrassed look from whoever said it. I’m not the militant type about it (unlike so many), so unless its someone I can tease, a glare, and a smile will usually suffice. But agreed, its those who’ve known me all the time, so…and they’re learning lol!
Mind, I have to get used to things as well. Yes, I was using ladies public toilets in Seattle just fine, but the Americans seem more open minded on such matters, well in most of the country at least, I’m not sure about the ‘Deep South’ all the same. Though to be honest, the matter has simply arisen less over here, I have less need to use public toilets, as most of my needs outside the home, are met at work, where I use the unisex ones anyway.
But last week, I went to the cricket at Headingley, and needed a ‘break’ while there. Yes, used the ladies, twice in fact, no problem at all. But yes, there is still this weird moment as I enter the ladies, and I think what I’m doing, after all these years, but I’m getting used to it. Of course, it might be easier done with a full cleavage, but dont quote me on that.
But no, I’m sticking to trousers, for now at least when out, though maybe one day it will be a skirt or a dress, who knows? But I’ll forego the high heels a lot longer than that lol!
The music, well the title seems sort of apt somehow
I do wonder if some might see this as a lazy way of posting my news on Facebook lol!
Yes, my bags are packed (well excluding laptop at least, obviously), and I’m ready to go, though as things stand, I have no plans to wear anyone’s wedding ring lol! If anyone hasnt worked out the song already, be ashamed of yourself! Unlike the singers though, I do know when I’ll be back again, well unless something amazing (or tragic?) happens anyway.
I was actually one out on the count of workdays, ended up being offered yesterday’s short shift as holiday, and I didnt say no, cant think why! And strictly, I havent yet packed the enhancers (will swop over tonight to the old pair), or shaver, for obvious reasons. There isnt much hair, but I want to be smooth for tomorrow, lets face it, its going to be a long day! Need to remember to use the ladies toilets too, if I’m busting out, that should be fun!
So yes, the next post will be from Seattle, at some point on Sunday, or Monday I suspect, so watch this space then. I suspect the main highlights at that point will be what airport security makes of the enhancers, whether I remembered to use the correct toilets, and if the Mariners won lol! Going to the game on Sunday, forecast is for a good day, hope thats right.
So miss me (I know, its kiss, but…lol), and smile for me, promise that you’ll wait for me, and all that, and I promise to write again from Seattle.
The video, only question is the artist, its…
I havent found any, but in a sense, that might be why I’m starting this blog. I’ve just been on one of the Trans boards I visit, to find a report about violence against a Transgender person, and what she has been doing about it.
Of course, what I’m in no position to say is how well she passes, I have no idea, I only know her through said board. Equally I know I get told that I do pass quite well, so maybe I’m just fortunate in that sense? Also, she lives in the London area, which I would have thought had areas where there were plenty of ‘idiots’ about. Maybe Yorkshire folk are more open minded, maybe they just dont realise I’m not a natural woman, but…?
And please dont say its a time of day thing, I work shifts, so I come out of work on a Friday, or Saturday evening (when the drunks, and football fans are plentifully about), and no one says a word, let alone threatens me (or more) at any time. I might attract the odd glance, but that really is about it with me. And at lunchtimes, I dont put a coat on, even during the cooler months, so I’m not exactly hiding my cleavage! Last September in Boston, the dirtiest look I got was when using the mens toilets in Boston Airport coming back, and he was making a clear point to me that it was the mens toilets I was in, lol!
This time around, with the enhancers in, I will be using the ladies, wonder if I will get any reaction to that?
Dont get me wrong, I’m not saying there isnt violence and abuse towards Transgender people, because all too sadly, there is! But whether its just that I’m lucky, or whether I just pass the radar tests, is it for me to say? I wish people through the world were more open minded about the whole Trans issue, but suspect that in real life, thats never going to happen.
It will be interesting to see what happens somewhere where nobody knows me, though I’m sure Boston gives me a good guide to that, nearly all will think I’m a woman! Just as well, because hopefully, rain permitting, I probably wont need a coat in Seattle at the end of April. So Stevie Lou will be busting out all over lol!
Ah, you want a video, let me see…what might be suitable? Shall I go with
PS, If anyone wants to spoil a fifty something lady in Seattle between the 22nd and 27th, let me know in advance, I’ll bring a nice dress with me! No, I wont be holding my breath for offers lol!
Well, so they tell us, today was officially the spring equinox, so I guess they must be right? Somehow, around here at least, if that was winter, it was definitely quite a tame one. Somehow I suspect we wont get away with it that lightly somehow? The old joke about snow at the start of the cricket season next month, quite possible I suspect?
And yes, the clocks go forward this weekend (in the UK at least, before my North American friends say something) which means the loss of an hour of precious sleep. And yes, I’m working both days this weekend, so I will notice it lol! Thankfully for me at least, not too narrow a split, so I’m sure I’ll survive. And I will get that hour back… eventually! The irony is we spend me more of the year on summer time, than on the natural time zone, but hey, if thats what the politicians want…? I’ve never been one to quite grasp the logic of why we do it, but I suspect most people feel the same way?
Well, in a sense at least, the countdown to my holiday has sort of begun. Had my nails painted (or more correctly, gelled) today, and the next time that will happen is the day before my holiday, appointment already made. Will get the full work over then, including waxing one or two places, but not anything too painful lol. Plus the much needed massage and facial, a girl has to look her best after all. I need to get my hair coloured as well, I’m amazed how well the extensions are holding up though, I must say.
This holiday will have at least one original moment, the need to use the ladies toilets while out, assuming I can actually find any public toilets in the US! Now I’m wearing the enhancers full time, any possibility of choice goes straight out the window lol! But as I seem to pass to most Americans, I’m probably worrying far more than I need to anyway! Distinct likelihood I will be flying wearing them too, as it seems there is no problem getting through airport security wearing them, according to Manchester Airport, and the TSA. I do need a new pair though, so ideally I can get them before I go, pack them in the case, and wear the old pair for flying, just in case anything does crop up. Last year I flew as a relatively flat chested lady, whereas this year, a bit more buxom lol!
Back to work tomorrow, so I dont quite know when the next blog will be, but currently the shifts arent so horrendous, so I might get a chance before Monday, next day off. Mind, given how many viewings I’m getting here of late, maybe I shouldnt worry so much about that?
Lastly, the video. Sorry, its a bit old, 82 years old to be exact. But I typed Spring is here on You Tube, and this is the first thing that came up. Besides, its from an era that a flapper should feel at home with, and so…
Oh, and talking of that. I had one of those style test things sent to me in an email by TK Maxx. Guess what, I came up as a Gatsby Girl, shock horror! Rofl 😉
But no, you arent getting the Bob Dylan video, hopefully that might fool one or two peoples expectations lol!
Its funny, I was reading a piece somewhere this morning in a Trans Related Group, comparing life for us now, even as opposed to 5 years ago, and the general impression I got is how much things have improved since then. Dont get me wrong, its not yet perfect, but a big improvement on how it used to be at least.
Mind, given how I seem to fall under the radar anyway, maybe I’m not the best person to comment on this. Again, yesterday, I was sat next to a woman on a train who clearly thought I was, and always had been female. Well, unless men are now able to bear children, and no one told me lol! Alright, I still get the very odd ‘Sir’, but they are pretty rare nowadays, and it shows how things have changed for me, it annoys me more nowadays than it ever used to!
However, long before all this enlightenment and the like, things did used to be different, and indeed many Trans people have been badly beaten, or indeed killed by idiots, just because of who they are. I suspect there might still be instances of this, but seem far fewer now, to me at least.
But it does seem, that going back long before recent times, there was one place that was so trans person friendly, that it stood out like a sore thumb for us, Brighton.
Brighton is still the only place I know where I’ve seen toilets marked ‘Ladies and T-Girls’ on the same door! There may be others in clubs (especially fetish ones I suspect?) but in Brighton this was widely prevalent nearly 10 years ago, let alone now. If only everywhere was so enlightened, as I’ve commented on in an earlier blog. I dont even remember seeing that in San Francisco, but maybe I just missed them?
I know, personally I think we should be able to use the Ladies regardless, but anyway…
Maybe one day we can even have true equality with correctly gendered people in all issues, but suspect that might take a little longer yet. Equally someday, the wonderful NHS might make the whole transgendering, and surgery issue so much easier, but again, I wont hold my breath.
Oh alright, the part I suspect only come here for, the music video. This has a tenuous link to Brighton, as Den Hegarty (bass vocalist) on this has lived most of his life in Brighton, and even more, was actually born in Ireland! I loved the doo-wop stuff of this era, and this might not be the last Darts song you ever see here!
I guess this is something most of you dont even think about, men go into the men’s toilets, and women’s go into the ladies. Simples, as Aleksandr Orlov would say (if you dont know, go to www.comparethemeerkat.com , and laugh.)
But then again, there are people like me! In the normal run of events I only tend to need to go, either at home (no labels), or at work, where the decision was made that I have to use the gents for now, presumably because I’m pre op, but…cant get convinced its right, but too easy going to argue. Do get some funny looks if there’s a visitor in there though lol! Would love to know some of the ladies opinions at work on this, but its hardly something you can just come out and ask!
Dont really need to use public toilets inbetween, so normally this situation doesnt arise. But when you’re away on holiday in Boston…even more so when the vast majority are calling you miss, madam, or lady…amazing just how well I seem to pass, considering that was with no use of make up! Hey, even security at Dublin Airport this morning thought I was a woman, and thats after a ‘red-eye’ flight overnight!
One piece of ‘entertainment’ was at MIT museum, restroom area seemed quiet, so I went for it, and maybe it was the work thing in my head, but I went in the mens. Fine, apart from the fact that several came in while I was in there. Got some very confused looks when I came out the cubicle. Even funnier was the airport last night, did the same thing, and again got funny looks while in there. Best moment though was the guy coming in as I was going out, he went back to check he was going in the right side!
So yes, alright, maybe I should starting using the ladies in public? But I dont want to cause trouble with the law or anything by doing so. But if I pass that well, and seemingly I do, do I need to worry about that happening? Mind, the irony of being asked why I’m going in the mens toilet does come to mind lol!
Probably be a couple of months or so before the situation arises again, I guess I just play it by ear, and then make a call on the matter, especially as it will probably be a shopping centre, with mothers there, and…
So the next time you go into a public (or even work) toilet, think how that choice might be easy for you, but for people like me…