Fine, I’ll get to the title matter in a minute, but for now…
Sunday evening started with a change of plans, a trip to the cinema, to see It. No, not the 1927 silent movie starring Clara Bow, though I’m sure she would have looked adorable, even in a clowns outfit. No, this was the recent (shock horror) movie based on the Stephen King book instead. Something very different for me, but impressed with it, all the same. Mind, the final outcome (of this section at least) appealed to me no end. The actress playing Beverley caught this actresses eye, as someone to watch for the future, just saying…
After that, a dose of ‘The Orville’ which is a new series on Fox over there, which seems to be a witty take off of Original Star Trek, among other things. Yes, the big attraction for me, the chrome robot, no surprise. Yes, if they ever want an actress to play his female companion… 😉 Suspect its just CGI, in truth, sadly. Not sure when I see any more of it mind, over here, but will keep an eye out for that.
Yesterday was the last full day (for a while) in the US, most of which I just spent relaxing, before heading for home, via JFK, in a shuttle. Yes, wisdom prevailed, given the state of my body at present, only way to go. Before that, I did get to see the Creature from the Black Lagoon thing, though sadly not wearable lol. But if anyone wants to make one, and let me wear it…?
Beyond the traffic levels to JFK (its NYC, for pity’s sake), that all went smoothly, and so did the ride through security. Then the fun began! I was taken to the gate on my boarding pass, for my plane home, fine. Thing was, the departures board was showing a different gate, some distance away, and some ‘know all’ told me my plane was going from there. So I struggled down there, only to find a short while later that my pusher had known what she was doing, and the know all was an idiot! So yes, I struggled back to the original gate I’d been left at.
There was 1 wheelchair waiting there, mine, and yes, someone came this time, and took me to the plane. At this point, someone asked me to swap seats, so he could sit with someone, and I agreed. Unfortunately, the idiot I soon discovered I had the ‘delights’ of sitting next to on the way home, thought rules were for everyone but himself. As in, mobile phones must be switched off before leaving the gate, and only be put back on, in flight mode, when we were in the air. Him, oh no! Trying to hide from everyone (very badly) that he was still using his phone after this point, and indeed continued to use it, until after the plane accelerated for take off. Even then, I’m not sure if he switched it off, or just hid it away. He was certainly still doing something with it post take off (not meant to be switched back on while seat belt light is on), so who knows? Put it this way, he was still using it this morning, up to, and including landing, long again after having been told to turn it off. Oh, and then everyone else decided to be an idiot, as more than half the people in the plane were standing up, long before the seat belt light went off at Manchester.
Then it got, err, better! There was only 1 wheelchair used at JFK to load a passenger, mine! So, at Manchester, only 1 is sent to the plane, to disembark me. Thing is, seemingly, 5 other people then decided they needed a wheelchair to disembark, despite not requesting one. My name was called, I stood up to get in, and another woman took my chair! She clearly wasnt going to move willingly, so in the end, they tried to round up another wheelchair for me, only to discover 4 more people wanting one! No, Manchester Airport doesnt employ psychics, to know that all these additional people suddenly would want a chair.
Finally, and I do mean finally, I was on the move. Snag was, with 4 pushers, and 6 chairs, movement was erratic, and slow. Not improved when I finally got to passport control, and there is a group of 3, from the sub continent, who were clearly being shifty about their reasons for entering the country. Finally, he decided to let them in, I passed through quickly, but then we had to get all these wheelchairs down to baggage claim. Then pick out the right black expanding suitcase, from dozens of them, but we got there in the end. So only about an hour later than expected, freedom, and greetings! Then at last, go home!
Oh, and one last thing before we move on from the holiday, and back to more mundane events, one of the movies shown on the flight across. A movie called Blended, which given my knowledge of modern movies, I had to look up when I got home. Take my advice, give it a miss. It has a shocking review rating, and the actress in the main female lead role was dreadful. One look on her face throughout the movie, basically rabbit caught in headlights! Yes, I swear even now, after a few years off, I could have acted the pants off her! So come on Hollywood, let me prove it, lol!
Thats it, then. Lets close by thanking Kate, Stacie, and Eric (mainly, but there were others) for such a marvelous holiday experience. Yes, being Maid of Honor, at a wedding, very special.
So what happens now? Another suitcase, in another hall (Evita)? Probably not! To a big degree, a lot depends what the doctors say about my back in the next couple of weeks, and how many days of work, per week, I can get through, post medication. I’m currently suspecting the answer will be 4, but we will see. Maybe a magic cure, or a nice new cybernetic body lol? Oh, I wish for the latter! I suspect I will be getting the airport wheelchair experience again too, but we will see?
In theory, if I could get there next month, I could go to NYC again for a reading for a production by 2 friends, surrounding the life of Clara Bow, but money (definitely), and holiday time (possibly) mean thats unlikely to happen. Ah well, might have knocked them over on Broadway, especially if they were looking for a middle aged woman confined to a wheelchair for a role lol. Still, keep on dreaming…
Right, video time. One thing a plane is called, is a silver machine, though I doubt thats what they’re talking about here! Dont think its a robotizing pod either, but its almost more likely! Yes, thats Lemmy, of Motorhead fame!
Right, firstly, as is tradition now, when on holiday, the 2 blogs align, this time for 10 days or so, so no point reading both, as a message to the few who know both!
Secondly, and I think this an age thing, as like me, this laptop is getting old, and so its not working as well. As far as I can tell (and I am not an expert, it seems to be a card issue, mainly graphics, but the sound doesnt seem too bright either), its had enough, and I will replace it with the one I bought 18 months ago off Dave, when I get back. I hate change, mainly because of all the log ins I have to suddenly write down, or remember, and aargh!
So if things stop completely, do not panic, its more likely the computer than me. Especially as the shutdown button no longer works, along with the image thing that appears in the right hand corner when new emails arrive. But enough of my woes…
Fine, the holiday!
Yesterday was travel day, and I reminded myself why I’ve cut right back on West Coast trips, the body (like this computer) really isnt up to it anymore. Even travelling in relative luxury for me (not basic economy), my knees were screaming for relief at the end of the flights, though my back was surviving better. Ah well, swings and roundabouts, as they say.
As to Virgin Atlantic, cant say enough in praise, good staff all around, and more than enough food to feed me for quite a while. Then we got to Atlanta!
Last time, I got through immigration, customs, and security there in a whir, about 15 minutes. Yesterday, when I had less time to spare, 80!I literally ran half the length of terminal A at Atlanta (and it felt a long way, with a laptop bag in hand), expecting to have just missed the plane to LA, but instead, the last couple were boarding, and I, along with another very delayed lady, just about got on.
To be honest, thats the end of the bad news, apart from a misdirection at baggage claim here in LA, where I rashly assumed the people in front of me knew where they were going, but they didnt! Soon in the right place, soon got the bags, and the shuttle was an absolute stroll! Good staff at the airport, good driver, and…Oh, the hotel room is seriously large!
Therefore today, I decided I was going to get the knees loose, with a nice long walk along, and then back along Hollywood Boulevard. It seems to have worked, though the back is complaining a bit more, so…
Ah, the camera, when I switched it on here this morning, 2 bars out of 3, so I left the batteries in. Snag was, after 1 photo, it was down to 1 bar, and after a couple more, it stopped working altogether…just as I was trying to get a photo of Jean’s star! So fine, I will go back and get it, even if my friend, April had already sent me one, but to have one, I took…
I did the tour of the wax museum, but most of them were modern names, not really what I was hoping for, especially as Monroe was featured everywhere in the entrance, I was hoping for more older stars, but…
It says it all, it hit 80 today, and I wilted. Mainly because I was out in the sun a lot, and being April, things havent really warmed up at home yet. So about 2.30, I called it quits, and came back to the hotel for a while. Beyond going out for dinner, thats it.
Tomorrow, I’ll do the guided tour thing, just to get all my bearings, before I set out on my own. But again, it will mainly be the modern stars, so, I’ll just live with it. Plan, if I can get there, is Dodgers baseball tomorrow night, so you might either get an early one tomorrow, or nothing until Saturday, before the big event.
Well, thats let you catch up on things, so for now, I’ll leave you in peace! The video, what I nearly didnt have enough of, yesterday
Given this is Canada Day, it seems to be the perfect time to bring up a piece of Canadian Law, which if seemingly enforced, affects Transgender folk, and not in a good way. However, in their defence, beyond one case, which wasnt really anti-transgender, because she fell foul of a previous non related discretion, there is no actual evidence of it being used. But…
Me, I’ve been to Canada twice, both times to Toronto, both times before I transitioned. And besides that, the ruling only came in during 2011, after my last visit there. ironic, because in so many other ways, Canada is one of the more friendly LGBT countries in the world. So, what happened?
Without going into all the niceties, to get through immigration, you are supposed to match the gender on your passport. Fine for most people, fine for post-op trans folk as well, of course. But, for those of us who are pre-op, or gender queer (as I believe the term is, pretty much me at the moment, living as a woman, but due to issues with the NHS, not planning on taking the op route at present), its a lot more tricky. Because my passport says I’m male, even if the boobs, and everything else pretty much say female! So what would happen, when I hit immigration in Canada?
As I say, all evidence would suggest that I’d get through fine, despite that M in my passport, and the fact that my cleavage is a bit large for a man! To be honest, I suspect that unless you get ‘red lighted’, for want of a better term, I doubt they even look at the gender thing on the passport. But…
To be honest, despite being law for nearly 3 years, it hasnt really affected me, I hadnt planned on going back to Canada in that time. But now, in the next couple of years, hmm…? To be honest, I’m only assuming it even still stands, as a Google search brings up no fresh information, and the person this year who was stopped did clearly state it was not because of transgender issues? So would I be fine?
Anyway, happy birthday, Canada, 147 today. If you want me, and my tourism money, let me know where a pre-op trans stands, as to entering the country.
Of course, the more interesting thing. If I get into the country fine, but then have ‘fun’ leaving the country, do they have to provide me with a job, and somewhere to live? 😉
The video, a Canadian, singing a very apt song. Any resemblance to a certain Robert Palmer video was entirely deliberate, I suspect!
No, its not really been that dramatic a weekend, though it might have felt it at times. Facebook contacts already should know the basic details, but… The frightening thing is, this isnt the worst trip to the US, or maybe technically it is, because the other time I didnt get here!
Now, to be fair to American Airlines, I knew there were problems of a major kind, even before I left home Saturday morning. What I didnt know was the exact details. And given that I had to be at the airport for 8.40 (2 hours before flight), and their customer services dont open till 8.30 on a Saturday…
I’ll admit it, we didnt get there for 8.40, even though we left in plenty of time, because in all her panic, some daft blonde, namely me, forgot her handbag, with all the important stuff in it! Got there for 8.50, hoping I was going to get an alternate routing, but no. Long and short of it, case is booked in, and then I have a choice, 11 hours of boredom at the airport (given the battery life is about an hour on the laptop), or pay up, and come home for 5 hours or so. Yes, I did the latter, and glad I did, when I found out in the evening that you now only get half an hour of free internet at the airport, unlike before!
We finally take off about 9.30pm, instead of 10.40 am, and arrive in Chicago about 11.45 their time. Immigration are fine, once they decide everyone goes through in one line, instead of the usual separation for US citizens, which put us in the wrong queue. But itwas so short, that by about 12.10, I’m picking up baggage, plus hotel vouchers, and my flight ticket for this morning.
So yes, I finally got here today, arrived at the hotel about midday, after a short delay for baggage, and waiting for the shuttle bus. Sadly plans for the afternoon Mariners game therefore get wiped out, given it was a 1.10 start, and I’m at least 45 minutes from town! Did contemplate a late start as its the only game I could get to this week, but then the shuttle bus had vanished by the time I’d unpacked, so…they lost anyway, shock horror, not!
Oh, did I mention its been in the 70’s over here today, and just walking around in a light top this afternoon, showing off the cleavage and all that. Same tomorrow, but then the weather is forecast to go downhill, ah well…Will have to go up Space Needle tomorrow before all you can see from the top is rain, lol! Ironically, the area I plan to be in next April is being forecast for 5-8 inches of snow! And no, that isnt Alaska either!
And in case anyone was wondering, TSA were right, just went straight through security absolutely fine both times! Mind, that wasnt the body scanner, might have been different if it had been, but should still have been fine after a pat down, so they tell me.
So yes, you can understand the choice of music, in an ironic wayl
I do wonder if some might see this as a lazy way of posting my news on Facebook lol!
Yes, my bags are packed (well excluding laptop at least, obviously), and I’m ready to go, though as things stand, I have no plans to wear anyone’s wedding ring lol! If anyone hasnt worked out the song already, be ashamed of yourself! Unlike the singers though, I do know when I’ll be back again, well unless something amazing (or tragic?) happens anyway.
I was actually one out on the count of workdays, ended up being offered yesterday’s short shift as holiday, and I didnt say no, cant think why! And strictly, I havent yet packed the enhancers (will swop over tonight to the old pair), or shaver, for obvious reasons. There isnt much hair, but I want to be smooth for tomorrow, lets face it, its going to be a long day! Need to remember to use the ladies toilets too, if I’m busting out, that should be fun!
So yes, the next post will be from Seattle, at some point on Sunday, or Monday I suspect, so watch this space then. I suspect the main highlights at that point will be what airport security makes of the enhancers, whether I remembered to use the correct toilets, and if the Mariners won lol! Going to the game on Sunday, forecast is for a good day, hope thats right.
So miss me (I know, its kiss, but…lol), and smile for me, promise that you’ll wait for me, and all that, and I promise to write again from Seattle.
The video, only question is the artist, its…
A great song, from a great musical, Carousel. Though the featured version here is the version I remember from the 1960’s, not actually from the musical, or film.
The thing is, for many transgender people, thats the opposite polarity to what they face in life, far too many are just left to fend for themselves as best they can. And lets face it, for far too many, it doesnt work. Its why suicide rates amongst transgender people are so high, its coping with being who you are in the world, where far too many people just want to take a blinkered attitiude to the problem.
As for depression rates, well, you really dont want to know how bad they are, though its not hard to work out why, is it? And unfortunately, it sometimes leads to the fact mentioned above. And yes, I suffered from depression for far too long, ironically without really knowing why, beyond the fact that something was wrong with me, but what, I hadnt a clue. But no, not any more, well not because of transgenderism at least. And yes, what I’ve got at the moment is more annoyance with certain people, than depression, though they are making me wonder why I bother at times. And no, as far as I know, no one reading this, or related to anyone reading this is the target of my venom either.
Thankfully, I dont have to walk alone, got a number of good friends who support me through this, and a few others who seemingly admire me for what I do, and have done. But many others dont have it so easy, and even for people like me, there are still a number who dont like what they see, and try to make life hard, but I’m doing my best to ignore them, but a few are in a position where thats easier said than done, but even so…
On a lighter note, there will be one (or technically two) walks alone that will be interesting on Saturday, the ones through security at the airports, while wearing my enhancers. I’m told everything should be fine, but I’m planning to use an old pair all the same, just in case and all that! They are probably right, I’ll suddenly realise I’m through, and laugh, but…its more the TSA at Chicago that worries me in that sense, you hear so many tales, but they’ve told me it will be fine, so…
Hopefully there will be one more post before I go, Friday, when I’m certain of my freedom from somewhere lol, I’m sure. I promise, that will be more cheery than this one, though it might be cheesy as well. I will post from Seattle when possible, for those who want to know, and to let you know what security was like, I guess.
The song, well I’ve given it away already, I would say? So just enjoy (in black and white)
Well, for those of you who read this on a regular basis, and I know there are some, this features a bit of an update on the last blog. In that, you might remember me mentioning about just maybe wearing my enhancers to work, and seeing what happened reaction wise? Well I did, and the reaction, absolutely zero! So no idea if they think its surgery or not!
Now whether this is because no one has noticed, or more likely because no one has the guts to say anything, I have no idea, the jury (thats me!) is out on that one at present. I’m assuming its more the latter, but nothing would surprise me at that place. Put it this way, I have no plans now not to wear them, unless I’m told otherwise. And yes, I’m seeing more of the assumption that if I’ve got boobs, I must be a woman, however butch lol! Admittedly they are slightly camouflaged by the coat at this time of the year, especially in a winter coat, but they are pretty obvious all the same. They certainly are at lunchtime, and no great reaction then either! Alright, I’m not doing a Dolly Parton type look, but I’m certainly bursting out a bit with them in, all the same. I’m not sure how it will all play out in the summer, when you dont need a coat, or just a thin one, but for now, I have no plans to stop then. Funnily enough, I can try out the theory in April, in Seattle, when no one will know me, and rain permitting, I shouldnt need a coat all the time, and can see what reaction they, sorry, I get.
The difference I’m noticing is the weight factor, for want of a better term. They might only weigh about 260g for the pair, but when you’re wearing them 24/7 (well alright, not in bath, havent found a way around that yet lol), I notice it far more than when it was about half the time, probably because I never get a break from carrying them on my chest. I know, a real woman doesnt get that break, but hey, for a long while, i didnt have that delight to worry about. How a really busty woman copes, I dont know, but she has my admiration. I know one thing, I feel liberated wearing them full time though.
Interesting thing, I always assumed because of the gels/liquids rule at airport security, that wearing silicone enhancers through there, and for flights wouldnt be permitted, but it seems I’m wrong there, apparently its fine, even with the TSA. I know, I checked! Seemingly what I read on one Transgender Forum, the only no-no is carrying them in hand luggage. Wearing them is fine, checked luggage is fine (done that a few times), just not carry on. Personally, thats not an option I’d even consider, I’d either pack them in the case, or be wearing them anyway! And now seemingly, wearing them is the most wonderful, and finest option for me.
Just a quick add, it seems it might not be so easy when travelling to Canada, or more correctly, from Canada. Though I do wonder what they do if you are leaving the country anyway! Does that mean they have to provide you with an apartment and job if they wont let you out lol?
Alright, the video. Going with the change of look thing here, even if Geri’s was a bit more radical than mine at the time. But I do think the line, “What you see is what you are getting.” so sums me up nowadays. Being buxom is definitely fun, and the world hasnt ended yet because of it lol!
I guess this is something most of you dont even think about, men go into the men’s toilets, and women’s go into the ladies. Simples, as Aleksandr Orlov would say (if you dont know, go to www.comparethemeerkat.com , and laugh.)
But then again, there are people like me! In the normal run of events I only tend to need to go, either at home (no labels), or at work, where the decision was made that I have to use the gents for now, presumably because I’m pre op, but…cant get convinced its right, but too easy going to argue. Do get some funny looks if there’s a visitor in there though lol! Would love to know some of the ladies opinions at work on this, but its hardly something you can just come out and ask!
Dont really need to use public toilets inbetween, so normally this situation doesnt arise. But when you’re away on holiday in Boston…even more so when the vast majority are calling you miss, madam, or lady…amazing just how well I seem to pass, considering that was with no use of make up! Hey, even security at Dublin Airport this morning thought I was a woman, and thats after a ‘red-eye’ flight overnight!
One piece of ‘entertainment’ was at MIT museum, restroom area seemed quiet, so I went for it, and maybe it was the work thing in my head, but I went in the mens. Fine, apart from the fact that several came in while I was in there. Got some very confused looks when I came out the cubicle. Even funnier was the airport last night, did the same thing, and again got funny looks while in there. Best moment though was the guy coming in as I was going out, he went back to check he was going in the right side!
So yes, alright, maybe I should starting using the ladies in public? But I dont want to cause trouble with the law or anything by doing so. But if I pass that well, and seemingly I do, do I need to worry about that happening? Mind, the irony of being asked why I’m going in the mens toilet does come to mind lol!
Probably be a couple of months or so before the situation arises again, I guess I just play it by ear, and then make a call on the matter, especially as it will probably be a shopping centre, with mothers there, and…
So the next time you go into a public (or even work) toilet, think how that choice might be easy for you, but for people like me…
Yes, this time you get the group name as the title, rather than the song. Just seemed more suitable that way, lol!
Though strictly I’m everything but a girl in one sense, its safe to say everything is wired female, but for the body! Though nowadays, but for one obvious thing, even that is pretty female nowadays. If I could only find a surgeon willing to adjust that for me, I could forget about all the hassle with the NHS, and not worry about anything else.
Oh alright, there are 2 ‘important’ set of people who insist I’m still male, the tax office, and the passport people, though ironically both are more than happy for me to be a Ms though! I can see their point in all honesty, I do still have male ‘bits’, but I’m living as a woman, so…swings and roundabouts I guess? Work is a mystery, they have me registered as a female, but ‘prefer’ me to use male toilets! I suppose if I was more miltant, but that really isnt my style, ah well…Similarly, I do wonder how they would react if I wore my enhancers to work, though in all honesty, I need them less day by day, but do enjoy being buxom, grin! Equally, I’d love to wear them to fly to and from the US, but being silicon in nature, I think security might object lol! Or am I wrong on that front?
So technically I’m everything but the girl, though thats probably the most important bit! I do wonder how potential employers would react to me though? Any genuine trans friendly employers out there I should know about?
Sorry, I know its been a few days, blame the shifts I’ve been getting at work for that. Off noiw until Wednesday, so I suspect you might not have to wait as long for the next post!
The song, some prefer the original version, some prefer the Todd Terry mix that made this record chart, I rather like both. And yes, you could say I had been ‘Missing’ for a few days.
Lets face it, for those of us that want a more feminine curve to our figures, there is plenty we can do to help with these matters. Make up is an obvious start point, though far too many t’s dont seem to think subtle will do, and plaster it on, only trouble is, that makes them stand out a mile, especially if wobbling in a mini skirt and high heels, as some like to do. Subtle might be too subtle for some to notice, but at least it keeps the idiots off your back. Me, I’m just lazy on that front lol!
Keeping yourself clean shaven is obviously a good starting point too, though some crossdressers and transvestites seem to think that stubble is part of the look, but cant see why! But transexuals seem to want to be very clean shaven, I probably want to do the impossible on that front lol! My top lip annoys me, the hairs are more or less gone, but the shadow created by years of growth takes a bit more shifting. But anyway…
Yes, I do use breast enhancers at home, but settle for the natural look when out. It does mean owning 2 sets of bras, but I can happily live with that. I’d love to be able to (without fuss) be a busty lady all of the time, but there are too many idiots about for that, for safety sake. And being honest, I pretty well fill a B cup bra nowadays, so all in all I should go ‘natural’ at all times now, but just love the feel, and weight of them too much for that.
I do own a corset, and could use it more to change the hips/waist ratio, especially as I am somewhere inbetween, but just find it uncomfortable for long term wear at work, and even more so for fighting on to commuter trains lol! And besides, like the enhancers, I couldnt easily wear either through security at airports anyway! Besides which, I wouldnt want to wear a corset on a Transatlantic flight anyway!
So whats the purpose of this you’re probably asking? The purpose is the one thing that isnt a simple thing to change, well not at a sensible price anyway. The one object I’d love to ‘have’ without surgery, is the right genitals. In other words, some form of enhancement that envelops the penis, so you look like you have a vagina, with just the end lips showing (labia) so that you could even go to toilet just like a woman does. Any inventors/designers out there with any bright ideas? I know there are pants you can get, but they are at inflated prices (because only t’s want to buy them), and short of buying multiple pairs, you cant wear them every day, whereas breast enhancers, with a little cleaning…
So if any reader, or friend of a reader out there is saying, “I can do that.”, then let me know, and we can discuss matters.