Yes, I humbly apologise to anyone who might have been concerned about my impending death after Tuesday’s posting, but thankfully, or otherwise, depending on your opinion of me, I’m still here.
So lets catch up on the events of the latter part of the week, then if you’re good, I’ll come up with something more interesting tomorrow.
You could say that a couple more rare events happened on Wednesday, in truth. Firstly, for the first time in a long while, I made a book sale. Yes, only one, but its been so long, anything is good. Funnily enough, I had advertised one of my books that morning, on Facebook, care of that anniversary thing they have, to annoy people, or otherwise. But equally ironic, that wasnt the one I made a sale on! If anyone does want to take a chance on my books, a link is https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/merrybrooks though you can find me under the same author name at other popular places too.
The other pleasant surprise I got on Wednesday, was a reward from a hotel group I’m a member of. A while back, I did a survey for them, and there were some prizes of a £10 Amazon certificate, and amazingly, I got one! No, I havent done anything with it yet, still pondering on that. Sadly, I’ve failed to find any genuine space craft on sale for £10! 😛 So I’m expecting it will either be something to wear, or something to eat, but undecided as yet.
Beyond that, and the main reason why its been so long since I wrote, I’ve been out doing interviews, and things. Had one over Bradford on Thursday, which I battled through, much as usual, which I suspect will probably bring the expected result, a lack of success. But hey, this week, who knows? Yesterday, I done my signing on in the morning, then headed over to Leeds, to register at an agency, as requested. Yes, I’m getting ever more cynical about these places, because when I got there, they told me that recruitment for this role had been suspended that morning. If I didnt know better, I would cynically think they never existed, but anyway, we will see.
Lastly, given a pair of successes this week, I decided to give the Lotteries a go this weekend. Well, last night, on the Euro Millions one, I got 1 number. Yes, no prize. I suspect tonight, with the UK one, will be more of the same, but I can hope, for a few more hours at least!
Oh, and my American ‘boy friend’ still seems to be in love with me, despite a few more postings showing I’m clearly not a natural woman. Who knows, maybe he knows, and doesnt care, but I dont see it that way, to be honest. But hey, I dont hide things, so…maybe one day I will get married, as a blushing bride. Yeah, stop laughing! Me, a wife, in California, you have to be joking, surely!
Right, the video. Something from a TV show from the 60’s, that I’ve found. Seems these 2 fine ladies are still going strong, at 79! Yes, married, I might get some day, but dont expect to see me holding my breath on that.
Yes, I know, a cheery sounding blog from me, scary stuff! But in truth, maybe things are finally turning for the better, after so long, we will see. Fine, so far at least, this week has been quite promising, so lets hope it lasts.
Firstly, I really look like a blonde again. I know, its not my natural colour, but I really dont care! I love being blonde, so…Added amusement with this, as I got to go under one of those wonderful hair dryer machines, that looks just like a brainwashing machine out of a good science fiction movie. Yes, real helmet type, complete with visor, dropped over my eyes, and then left for my mind to melt away…oh, I wish! But yes, if I’d known I was going under one of those, instead of the normal cap type dryer hood I normally go under, I’d have taken a camera, and taken a selfie! Especially as it had a red light on the front, when switched on.
Next bit of good news, I’ve finally got agreement on my rent benefit figure, and in truth, it was slightly more than I was expecting to get. Alright, its tempered by the fact that I’m not getting any back pay, but at least the difference between what I owe here, and what I will be getting, is sufficient to allow me to at least get a few basic things done. Not that I’m now looking forward to a good waxing session, its going to hurt, but so needs to be done! One or two other little things as well, like technically spending the balance of my birthday money, once that arrives will be nice too.
Oh, and then, this afternoon, I got a call from one of the agencies, got an interview in Elland, on Monday. So providing I make a decent show of that, I might get a job too! I know, me, competency questions, and all that, but hey, I might be on a roll! Alright, stop laughing, but…
Lastly, though I dont gamble any more, other than once a year, funnily enough, done today, for Saturday, I still do sports competitions on the net. One site I know, because of Facebook postings, offered a free contest on the first day of Aintree today, and yes, I came 4th, out of 100! £5 worth of free bets! Not a fortune, but any beacon of hope is good for me at present.
So yes, this Saturday, the National Lottery are doing one of their specials! Usually there is 1 millionaire, and 20 prizes of £20,000 on each draw, as well as the standard 6 ball stuff. This weekend, its 10 millionaires! So what do you reckon, should I get a lottery ticket? Hey, even £20,000 would more than solve all current issues, let alone a million!
No, I’m not going to count my blessings until that rent money is in the bank, and stuff, and I’m certainly not going to expect a lottery win, even if I go for it. As to being brainwashed, by some evil machine, oh I wish, but I suspect, only in my dreams!
The video. As the singer says, maybe things really are getting better, not before time!
Yes, lets start with the hypnosis session, on Saturday, as given the title of the blog, its a good place to do so. I guess its a case of when you go for the first time to someone you’ve only known through Facebook, you have to be a little cautious with these things. I know, its only in fiction that your mind becomes totally controlled unwillingly, but anyway…lol!
Well yes, it did what it was meant to do, relaxed and destressed me. All in all, a very pleasant period under trance, in very able hands. Fine, I’m not known for my hypnotic resistance skills, but she got me under quite easily. No, I dont remember all the details, but then again, you’re not meant to, just your subconscious that is. Has it worked? Well, in the sense of being more relaxed, then yes it has. If you mean in the related sense of allowing me to find competency based questions any easier, then no, it hasnt! 😛
After that, we had a pleasant chat for a while, and the subject of my past life self came up. And so intrigued was she by it all, that she said that she was likely to study up on past life regressions, so Clara might not be hiding away much longer! In fact, later that day, she tried it on a friend, it worked, so now she’s fascinated by the subject. A possible win/win, with luck. Oh, and if anyone in the area wants my recommendation of a hypnotherapist, ask!
So, what else has happened in the last few days? No, I didnt win anything on either lottery, before you ask! What a shock, not! A nice meal out, last night with the others from here, it being Ella’s birthday today, but given she wouldnt be here tonight, we celebrated then. I passed on the dress given the current weather, as mine dont tend to be of the warm, winter kind, you see!
Today has been more of the same, a few job applications, a couple of early rejections, and a couple of possibles. I’m trying not to let the rejections get to me, but as the money runs lower, then yes, the more concerned I get. Hopefully something comes through before I start contemplating silly things! Vicious circle, absolutely! I know its getting bad when I start contemplating doing the lottery again this week, just because a decent win could end all my worries. But me, winning anything like that, I wish! Never happened when the money wasnt a concern, let alone now!
Right, before I stop relaxing, and stress myself again, I’ll stop here, not much else to say, anyway.
The video, well the clue is in the title, but given I dont even remember this track, I’m pretty sure most wont!
Its funny, nearly a week on from the big lottery jackpot over here, I was thinking, just how much do you need to win before the amount becomes irrelevant?
I know, previous huge lottery winners have seemed to manage to go on crazy spending sprees, and blow all the money, but I know with my Yorkshire nature, I’m sure I couldnt do a thing like that. And before anyone comments on the ridiculous concept of possibly winning £66 million, as was available last weekend on the lottery over here, that was absolutely nothing compared to what has been happening in the US. Yes, seriously, the Powerball lottery over there, which was actually won on Wednesday (and which has no rollover limitations) had actually reached a pool of $1.4 billion (1400 million) dollars, before being shared 3 ways. But fine, does the average person really need a prize of over $400 million dollars? And how, in a normal way, are you going to spend all that?
So fine, I’ve bought a lottery ticket for tomorrow night, and its not for the rollover value yet, its because instead of the normal 1 millionaire prize, there will be 5. And I’ll be honest with you, if I won one of those, I’d be more than happy, and could give up this exhausting job hunting lark. I might not have enough to be able to buy a property, and move to Hollywood, but it would be a pretty good prize all the same, and I could afford to spend plenty of 90 day allowances out there, with that! Spend even about half on various things, I could probably get by on the interest from the rest!
To be honest, the 20 £20,000 prizes, one of those could solve a lot of concerns for quite a while. Even treating myself to 2 or 3 stays over there, I could survive for 18 months, very easily. Even half that, I could go for at least 9 months treating myself, probably about 12 if I’m sensible, but I’d prefer the 20 K option.
But for me, what would be a nice amount to win? One that solves all issues, but at the same time is not so insane an amount that it would blow my mind? Yes, I guess the million would more than do that. And fine, thats why I got talked into buying a ticket for the Euro millions draw tonight, with a rollover of £61.5 million! First time I’ve ever bought one, have no idea whats involved, or the prize scale is, to be honest. But its done, and another £2 I’ve wasted, that I probably shouldnt have done, in all honesty. But for a few hours, this girl can dream, or is that panic, about winning that jackpot?
The video, as so often, the clue is in the title. This is a live version, featuring 2 of the greatest guitarists of all time
Oh, I meant to add, I might have found one way of getting over the trauma of winning so much money. Yes, hypnosis. Tomorrow, I’m doing a relaxation, and stress busting hypnotherapy session somewhere near Huddersfield, at a reduced price special. This should have happened on the Saturday I was doing training for the ‘job from hell’, I wish I’d stuck with the original plan. At least for 45 minutes, I can let all the stress, and worry float away, I so need it!
The one thing I’ve barely done since getting back from Hollywood, is just having a day out, anywhere. In fact, in truth, after the first month or so of post redundancy life, I havent actually done a lot of things, just fun, for myself, apart from the 2 US breaks. Yes, they were quite something, believe me, but other than that, Harlean has been a pretty dull girl, in all honesty. To be fair, my own choice, I’ve been trying to (apart from those delights) to keep costs to a minimum, apart from the lottery of late, though that so far at least, has proved to be wishful thinking. At least Saturday, it has to be paid out, so I wont have to buy one again for a while at least. Mind, 1 of the £20,000 prizes would be enough to preserve my sanity, not part of £57 million, but I’m not likely to get either, I’m sure. Still, compared to the Powerball lottery in the US, which has now reached $600 million, its chicken feed, but anyway…
So yes, I’m beginning to feel a bit of jail fever, of sorts, especially as of course there were no interviews over the Christmas Period. I should have had a registration trip on Tuesday, but I havent got ID until that passport actually arrives, so its been put back until it does. Anyway, I’m planning a prison break tomorrow! No, not seriously an escape, I can still walk out of here in freedom, but a day away from here might just do me good. Yes, its an expense, a rail fare to Nottingham, and actually having to pay cash for bus fares around here, but apart from that…
A couple of years ago, or so, I actually went to a Vintage fair, in Leeds. While there, I had my hair, and make up done, by a couple of lovely ladies, using their mobile studio. Yes, you’ve guessed it, their main place is in Nottingham. An example of their work?
Earlier this week, they were looking for a volunteer to help out, with training a new person in the ways of vintage make up styles. And I offered, if they got no one more local, and I guess they didnt? So tomorrow, I’m off down there. Strictly, no fee, though I will leave with my make up done, and my hair styled, 30’s style, so not altogether a bad deal?
But yes, it gets me out of here for a day, and even if I wont be going anywhere, I’ll look nice for a day or two!
Right, the video. What my look will do for me tomorrow. Might not be a true Jean Harlow, but I’ll have the 30’s look!
Yes, I know, its a couple of days early, but there’s a good reason for that, more on that at the end of the blog. Facebook, and Twitter followers know already, but for those who dont…! Normally this is a cheery event, but circumstances mean its less so this time around.
Well, one thing I can definitely look forward to in 2016, is a new me! Strictly, I’ve already applied for a few jobs as Harlean, but I guess that is going to peak far more in the New Year. Hopefully very quickly in the New Year, the passport will be back, in my new name, and gender, as I’m strictly without ID at present, so fingers crossed, as doing interviews, and registrations would be, err, entertaining without one! Wouldnt it be ironic if after all these interview battles as Stevie Nicholls, that Harlean Carpenter got one quickly. No, I’m not quite as sure as that, but we will see.
The main thing I’m looking forward to, when I can afford it at least, is that first flight as a woman named Harlean, that really is going to be a special moment. Ideally, that will be May, to New England, to meet up with Kate, but as I say, short of financial salvation, or a lottery win, I need a job before then! If the job, or financial situation solved itself, I have no idea about the second holiday at present. Money, I’d love to do another 4 week stay in Hollywood, but if I’m in a job, not going to happen. Ah well, something will hopefully sort itself out.
How long before money becomes a really major issue, did you ask? About 10 weeks I guess, really beginning to get concerned about that now, I never imagined it would get to this.
Beyond that, I guess I might pluck up the courage to find a partner, though I’m not quite sure who would want me, I’m hardly a great prize, lets face it! But yes, if I can find a decent site, that doesnt want a fee for the privilege, I might dip my toes in, and find out what its like to be wooed again. Snag is, I can hardly pay my part of any date at present, ah well…I need a rich hero lol!
Or find myself a wealthy Mistress, or Master, to be a thoroughly submissive slave to? I know, might be fun, but I’m not prime material, age, or body! Who wants a hypno-bot, or even better, a real one lol? Fine, I’d be a human one, but…
But yes, its hard to look forward to 2016 with conviction at present, because so much depends on finding that job, or a wealthy benefactor, or both. Or a lottery win? Fine, I’ll stop laughing on that one now!
The other option is to find a time machine, go back to the 1930’s, where I’d have a small fortune, and…kidding, I think?
So yes, all in all, as Bonnie Tyler says in the video, I’m holding out for a hero. Job offer, benefactor, or a lottery machine churning out the right numbers, any would do!
Yes, fine, as I mentioned, I’m doing this early for a purpose. The last blog of the year, feel free to suggest a subject you’d like to hear me waffle on. Only condition, its something I can easily type about 600 words on, and thats it, the rest is up to you. Comment here, send it by Twitter at @harleanlook, or on my Facebook page at Harlean Stephanie Carpenter, or as more likely from past experience, do nothing at all. Be a devil, and just come back in 2 days time, and see what I selected.
Fine, I had to post this earlier than I normally would, because after the event would be a pointless exercise, so…
I cant remember the last time I played the National Lottery, to be honest. The last time I would have played it on a regular basis, that much I know, was 2002. I have bought the odd lucky dip ticket since then, when there has been a rollover, but in all honesty, its been quite a while since I even did that, certainly not at all since they doubled the cost of the tickets, for sure. And now they’ve gone and added 10 more numbers too, making it even more challenging to win the jackpot. Which is probably why the estimated rollover jackpot for tonight is £26.3 million, because it hasnt been won in quite a while. But I’ve cracked, just for once, and bought a ticket.
No, I dont seriously expect to win the jackpot. Hey, in all honesty, with my luck, I’ll be amazed if I get 1 number, let alone all 6! But something inspired me to give it a try, and hey, lose £2!
To be honest, compared to some lottery jackpots, £26.3 million is chicken feed. The Euromillions one seems to hit £100 million from time to time, and as for things like the Powerball lottery in the US, well, absolutely nothing!
But even so, that sort of sum of money is still way beyond my comprehension, and I have no idea what I would do with most of it, other than savings, and letting the interest give me a comfortable lifestyle.
I guess there are a few obvious things I would do with it. A nice home, in Hollywood, if I could convince the US authorities to let me in (and that much money would influence things, I’m sure), but nothing too excessive, I’m just not the type for that. A comfortable 2 bedroom apartment, in the Hollywood Hills, around Beachwood, would suit me fine, I wouldnt need more. If they wont let me in, I’ll find somewhere nice over here, with good public transport, and settle for that. But in my dreams…
I guess the other obvious thing I would then get done, is have a ‘few bits’ rearranged, as I could afford the best surgery possible, so what the hell, I’d probably get it done, with a whole lot less fuss than some I could name. I have to admit, I’m not sure about the pain involved, which puts me off at present, but I suppose with that much money behind me, I could get the best care possible, and a bit more! Anyone who doesnt know what ‘bits’ I’m talking about, hasnt been reading this blog before lol!
But seriously, beyond that, what would I spend money on, apart from general living costs, given the only work I would then do, would be some writing! No idea? I mean, I’d probably get a few nice dresses, maybe a corset or two (especially if someone can design a self tightening one!), and almost certainly a custom made robot suit, just because I’d love one, even if it doesnt actually turn me into a robot, hey, I could look the part.
What I dont think I’d do, even if perhaps I could, and should.
A boob job. Yes, it would be wonderful to have a pair of C Cups of my own, I guess, but the thought of doing that, I just dont know? Again, I suppose with this wealth, I could get it done by the best surgeons, and everything else, so maybe. But while I have such excellent silicon prostheses, why do it to yourself?
Plastic surgery. Please, no. I know, I could find a surgeon who could make me look even more like Jean Harlow, but I’ve seen the results, and how often it just makes things worse, not better. And besides, I’m middle aged, if Jean had reached her fifties, I might look just like her, but we will of course, never know.
Oh, and the one silly thing I would do.
Simple, fly first/business class, depending on airline. I have walked through, or seen first class a few times now, but never traveled that way. Yes, its one of those silly things I’ve always wanted to do, if money was no object. Ironically, I’m hitting the range with Delta, where I can request complimentary upgrades, but given how many ask, how far down the list I would be (I’m only silver status), its not likely to happen that way.
But fine, in the end, this posting is just a dream, nothing more. Because the strict chances of me getting 6 numbers tonight are about 30 million to one, and I dont have any luck in draws with far more favourable odds than that. But for a couple of hours more, I can dream, so…
No, dont expect a blog in the morning saying I’ve won the jackpot lol!
The video sums up my chances of winning anything tonight, let alone £26.3 million!
Of how good, or bad your life might have been? I could have used the line from this meme, as I suspect I havent got any young readers, and it will be in the image anyway, but…Yes, I’ve had some frustrations in my life, to put it mildly, or to put it more succinctly in image form
Initially, when I saw this, I was only really thinking of the last fortnight or so, but in all truth, it pretty much sums up my life as a whole, doesnt it? How I’ve lasted this long, I have no idea, and even more so of late I’ve felt that way about things.
And issues dont seem to be sorting out easily either. Not only have I not heard from my ‘last workplace’ yet, about when, and how much I’m getting paid, which doesnt surprise me, I sort of caught on yesterday (my first real chance to breathe in a while) that I havent had the letter I’m due from the Doctor, re getting my correct gender on my new passport, so I guess I’m going to have to chase him up again, oh joy!
I did amuse myself today by contemplating getting a Lottery ticket for tomorrow night (the rollover is up to £22.5 million), but seriously, with my luck at present, I’m more likely to get no numbers, than get 6! But the temptation to waste £2, and get one, well, I might just do it! Would certainly enable me to consider a move to Hollywood if I won that lol, and not have to worry about working either! Hey, 4 numbers would help at present, let alone 6! Might still go ahead, and waste £2 anyway, just to get out for a while, if nothing else.
Mind, remarkably, I’ve got an interview on Thursday. No, its not my dream job (just at present I’m not sure what is, apart from mad scientist’s guinea pig!), but it sounds more interesting than the last one, and hopefully they will give me the equipment to do the job, at least. But nowadays, I think I’ll wait and see…
I know, cynical bitch, but can you really blame me at present?
The video, a lesser known Howard Jones track, that possibly sums up my thoughts about life at present!